"The road to hell is paved with works-in-progress" - Phillip Roth
When I found out that a key part of this class was writing a blog my heart sank. I ignored it as a method of denial. Of course, with my late start in the assignments for this class I didn't have long to do that.
I've wanted to blog for years. And years. And years. In fact when I went to make my blogger account for this class there were multiple blog titles that I've created over the years but not a single post. Why? Another four letter word. Fear.
Blogging in a public forum gives me intense anxiety. I find this especially ironic because one of the benefits listed in our article is the stress reduction and health benefits that come from journaling (or in this case blogging). That paragraph made me laugh.
It's not that I think I don't have enough to write about. I don't need Progoff to tell me how to come up with "new insights, reflections and ideas". I'm dying to start a lifestyle blog. I come up with post topics everyday. One of my favorite blogs is looking for contributing writers right now. So why don't I do it?
"To gain your own voice, you have to forget about having it heard" - Allen Ginsberg
I know I can write. I write for school. I write for my job. I write well. I always have. But for some absurd reason blogging terrifies me. When I write for an assignment, whether academic or professional, it doesn't feel like it's me. It's the putting myself out there of blogging that causes pain in my gut; when I start a lifestyle blog it will be so personal. And let's face it: people on the internet are judgmental. They say things in your comments they would never say to your face. I wonder if I can take it. Do I want to know what people think of my "intuition and self-expression"?
Rotolo touches on the important thing about blog content is it is designed to be shared. That's a statement that just feeds the monster for me. What if it's shared in order to ridicule? What if they don't like my supporting images? What if my title isn't catchy it's kitchy?
"I think I can, I think I can..." - Thomas the Train
So, as the benefits of journaling states journal writing leads to personal growth and development. Let's sure hope so. This class might be the best thing that ever happened to me. Or the worst. Creating my first blog when it's going to be read and graded. I certainly have a way of jumping into things headfirst.
It's time to jump off the cliff. Let's just hope something catches me on the way down.
